Tuesday 4 September 2012

Cabinet reshuffle: New line up

New roles are announced, including quotes:

PRIME MINISTER
Kermit the Frog
"My media skills and experience of leading a multifaceted merry band will make this government successful, and the funniest ever!"

DEPUTY PRIME MINISTER
Ms Piggy
PM: "She'll be good for pompous state occasions!" (Arms were twisted on this appointment. )

FOREIGN SECRETARY
Paddington Bear
Too humble to comment. PM: "PB has sound experience of dealing with the unknown with total humility and integrity" 

CHANCELLOR
The Very Hungry Caterpillar
"I will draw from my own experience, and lead the transformation of the economic system to sustainable growth"

HOME SECRETARY
Elmo
"I will make everyone feel at home" (not sure Elmo's read the job description)

JUSTICE & PEACE
Petit Prince
"Hat? Elephant! We simply require a new look at things"

HEALTH & TRANSPORT
Cookie Monster & Swimmy
"Working together, will get us there" and "Blubbblubb"

EDUCATION
Hello Kitty
"They listen to me, you know"

BUSINESS
Womble Madame Cholet
"I have first-hand experience of setting up sustainable activities and make them work"

ENERGY AND CLIMATE CHANGE
Alice in Wonderland
"I wonder why. I just went down a rabbit's hole!"

COMMUNITIES AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT SECRETARY
Winnie-the-Pooh
Not available for comment. Attending important honey business. PM: "His stoical Zen approach will help"

ENVIRONMENT
The Lorax
No comment available at the time of appointment. Away on Grickle-grass business. PM: "Demonstrable working knowledge of effects of a finite world"

INTERNATIONAL DEVELOPMENT
Mother Clanger
"There is some extensive experience of other rocks in the sky (what do you call them?), that's probably the reason. Now excuse me. Tiny, can you fetch some blue string soup?"

CHIEF WHIP
The Gruffalo
"They say I have assertiveness"

CULTURE
the mouse Frederick
"I have done it before myself, writer, composer, poet" *blush*

MINISTER WITHOUT PORTFOLIO 
Miffy
"Yea, bit miffed about that"

Comment: Congratulations all! The gender split could be better. We caught some ministers on a ministerial outing. 



Happily ever after.

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